I Heart SCV
January, 2018 - Issue #160
30 Very Specific Things
You Heart (or Hearted) about SCV

1.When the ladies who sell Fuji apples at the COC Farmer's Market round down the price so you don't have to hold onto 95 cents in change.

2.The absurdity of Frank Ferry's "Mayor Dude" campaign. (2009)

3.Watching SCV resident Allyson Felix compete at the Olympics on her way to becoming the most decorated woman in US Track and Field history.
(2004, 2008, 2012, 2016)

4.Hearing that your visiting relatives are OK with a day at Magic Mountain instead of Disneyland.

5.Enjoying the late Randy Wicks' perfectly-executed and usually-hilarious political cartoons in a paper version of The Signal. (Through the early 1990s.)

6.Our former US Congressman Buck McKeon, once a seller of boots and plaid shirts, inexplicably becoming chairman of the House Armed Services Committee. (2011)

7.Waving at John Quigley when he spent over two months sitting in that huge oak tree in Stevenson Ranch to stop developers from cutting it down. (2002)

8.Christmas lights on Wakefield Court.

9.Turning on a car chase, preferably live on KTLA or KCAL9, and getting a vicarious thrill because you know the exact streets the guy is using because they're part of your commute.

10.When Jill Klajic "allegedly" threw (she claims "slid") her paperweight at Jo Anne Darcy when Darcy stole her turn to be mayor. (1999)

11.Singing the jingles from local commercials with friends who instantly know the words, too, even a decade later. (Acura's a frieeeeend-ship). (2001)

12.The thrill of victory when you make the light at McBean and Bouquet.

13.Walking on a bike path by the Santa Clara River after a heavy rain and trying to keep up with the stick you threw in the flood water. (El Nino, 1997)


15.Going to Schooners to watch a game when the Lakers were still good.

16.Taking a hike at Elsmere Canyon and not seeing another human being the entire time.

17.Being offered a paper cup full of water poured from an Arrowhead jug when you went to see how friends and family were doing right after the Northridge quake. (1994)

18.Watching our lovely valley evaporate into a nuclear fireball on FOX's "24." (2007)

19.Santa Clarita voters stopping that ridiculous deal to install giant electronic billboards up and down the freeways. (2014)

20.Going on SCVTalk first thing every morning to read Jeff Wilson's daily brief and get in an argument in the comments section with Steve Petzold, Tim Myers, Mike Devlin, Nate Imhoff and/or Bill Reynolds. (2008)

21.Knowing all of your neighbors are experts on schools, real estate and mid-size family vehicles, should a question ever arise.

22.When the Cowboy Festival was (A) Still called the Cowboy Poetry Festival (PoFest), (B) Still at Melody Ranch and (C) Way better than it is now.

23.Saving the beloved Placerita Canyon Nature Center from enormous wildfires pretty much every year.

24.Seeing Halfway House Cafe in favorite TV shows and movies like "Heroes," "CSI," "Waitress," "Space Cowboys" and more.

25.A half-inch of snow shutting down the whole valley for a day. (1989)

26.The heyday of Lombardi Ranch and enjoying fresh corn, pumpkins, scarecrows, farm animals and the smell of sawdust and old straw.

27.Stumbling across the Newhalls (Yes, those Newhalls!) and asking Tony and Reena about whether Lindsey is in Thailand or Ukraine or maybe just hanging out at Jana's.

28.Hearing coyotes wildly yipping and yelping at night, especially when your dog is too big to be eaten even if the coyotes jump your fence.

29.The stack of mailers that comes during every election season - and having your friends think you're an expert in local politics just because you know a few names.

30.Being able to go to The Original Saugus Cafe 24 hours a day and knowing it's been around in one form or another since the 1800s, even serving presidents. As Jerry Reynolds wrote, it has "walls fairly reeking with history." Well, history and hashbrown grease. It's a good reminder that Santa Clarita's history didn't begin with cityhood but that people have hearted this place for a long time and will, we hope, for decades more.

It's all too easy to poke fun at the City's efforts, but deep down, I'm a sucker for this kind of thing. Santa Clarita is like that one friend you have, the one who always invites you out but who you are too busy to set aside a little time for. Well stop that. Santa Clarita's 30 years old, so this December 15, take a moment to remember why you heart it.
This column is intended as satire and a (sometimes successful) attempt at humor. Suggestions, catty comments and veiled threats intended for the author can be e-mailed to
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